Why do people hurt people?
We've all had our fair share of mean people in our lives. So i'm sure every single one of us can relate to this post.
I for one, am sick and tired of people telling me to get over it, grow up and move on. Sure, it's the easy way out - to get over it and move on. We constantly hurt ourselves trying to perfect ourselves. But for whom? For people that do not appreciate our true self, the one beneath the facade.
Do you not realize how you can break a person's spirit with a mere word? How the person will no longer be able to gaze at their reflection in the mirror without thinking that they are less than enough? No one is less than enough. People speak a lot of shit. Way too much shit.
I was a loner in primary school. My only friend was Wan Qing because everyone else outcast-ed me. Because i was less of a pretty/ rich/ smart/ funny. I was constantly picked on in school. People would leave messages on my desk saying i was a 'peasant' or 'ugly' and what not. We were children. My classmates often stole from me and i knew not how to stand up for myself. Puberty struck me early and it made me less than perfect. I was breaking out so much, my face was wow. Just wow. All the more reason to hate on me, huh?
I was part of track team in secondary school. And my skin just got from bad to worst. I had seniors shouting 'HEY PREFECT! WHY YOUR SKIN SO DIRTY ONE?!' My classmates would also laugh at me saying my skin wasn't smooth.
That was when i started to change myself just so that people would start to think that i'm pretty and maybe, just maybe, like me. I scrubbed my face so hard, so many times, every single day. I wore contact lenses and cut my hair. I first cut my hair into a bob but soon after shaved both sides of my head to look like a butch. People liked me better as a butch. I was happier as a butch. But then came prom night. That was the first time i wore makeup out. And my crush said that i looked so pretty for the first time ever and meant it. I asked why and he said 'Oh, i think it's because of the makeup.'
Hell, i was overjoyed because he said that i was pretty and meant it. It was then that i started to rely on make up so much, it's unhealthy.
Ever since i stepped into Polytechnic, i've been using make up every single day of my life if i were to step out of my place. If i didn't, i would feel so ugly and i CANNOT look people in the eye when they talk to me because i'm so afraid that they would look at all my imperfections and judge me. I rely on makeup so much my face is just made up lol. Every night when i get home, i take off my make up, my contact lenses and put on my glasses. Then i stare at my reflection and my stomach churns at what i see. Because i am less than perfect.
At this point in time you might be thinking, 'Why is this bimbo posting all these. I bet she's just out to seek pity and fish for compliments.' If you are, i'm sorry. I'm not. I want people to realize how it's not alright to call someone less than pretty, fat, ugly, or whatever mean names you can think of. It is just not alright.
Who gave you the right to call someone less than perfect? Honey, you may look so perfect but hold up for a second and think. Who gave you such great features? Your parents right? Alright now think. If your child came out and looked 'less than perfect' in other people's eyes, who's to blame? His/her parents? AKA you? Nah that doesn't seem right. You're perfect, right? Do you get what i'm saying now?
People throw the words 'ugly', 'fat', 'thick', 'slut', 'nerd', and so so so many other horrible names around so easily. My mother taught me never to call someone names because it isn't a nice thing to do. and I can proudly say that I've never, in my entire life called someone names. If you're reading this and you beg to differ because I've called you names before, I apologize. I've never found i funny for anyone to call another person name even if they were joking. You can see the hurt in the other person's face even if they laugh it off. It's not funny. Not funny at all.
Too many of us have turned to self harm because of all these name calling and perception of 'true beauty'. Many of us can say things like 'You don't have to wear make up to look pretty. You don't have to be thin to be perfect.' but these people are the very ones calling people names.
Please stop calling people names. We were not made to be perfect. There isn't perfect in this world goddamn it there isn't. STOP. Just stop looking for perfection in other people when you don't even know what perfection is. Stop calling people names. Because when your child sees you calling someone names, they'd learn from you. And you'll just give rise to another generation of suicidal teens. I'm sure none of you were brought up to hate on people. All of us were taught to love, to be nice to each other. So where did we screw up? If you know for a fact that you've been calling people names, it's not too late to stop. The next time you're about to call someone ugly, be it a joke or not, stop. Think before you speak. Should it slip your tongue, it's not too late to apologize. Apologize and mean it. Mean your apology.
We pray for a better tomorrow, for a better generation. It's time to work alongside prayer. Change starts with us. As an individual, then a community.
